Do you remember the Brady Bunch episode where Jan was tired of being overshadowed by Marsha, and she said "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha, all everyone talks about is Marsha" (I'm paraphrasing, I wasn't a huge fan of Brady Bunch, but I do remember a few episodes). I think of that line when I read Luke 10:40-42 "But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”
Dear Lord: Help me to have Mary's heart. I am Martha by default. In Jesus Name, Amen.
Do any of my readers suffer from having your brain just keep dwelling on all that isn't "right" with your life, your home, your children, etc.? Right now I am feeling tremendous guilt over the lack of discipline and organization I see in my teenage son. I take blame for not instilling the proper character traits in him. I know that it isn't too late, and I have hope that I (actually, God through me and my husband) can still make an impact, but, man, it can be so frustrating. Tonight, a few of my children were watching Sound of Music (still love that movie!!) and I heard them singing "Maria" and odd as it may seem, I related some of the words to my feelings toward my son. "Many of things you know you'd like to tell her (him), many of things she (he) ought to understand. But, how do you make her (him) stay and listen to all you say? How do you keep a wave upon the sand?" He just does his own thing. He isn't 'in your face' disobedient, but he doesn't listen either. I call it quietly rebellious.
My mind just keep hashing over all of the things I should do, I shouldn't do, I should talk to my husband about, I should guide my children through, I should teach, I should change. . . sometimes I just wish I had a switch that would allow me to stop thinking. I do have hope. Hope in our Lord, and that He makes no mistakes. It also helps to know that His ways are not like ours, because I can come up with loads of things that I perceive that He has gotten wrong. . . but, of course, he hasn't. I am meant to be living the life I live. Honestly, I am meant to feel the convictions I am feeling. Still, I need to have a peace through it all. I need to learn how to come to the Lord and leave it at His feet. Still learning. . . . :-)
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